Yeah, as much as I would like to think that I have grown up, gained knowledge, become better, smarter, the similarities to the past are still stark. I have never been the most confident person. I have always been uncomfortable with parts of my life, (weight, general looks, overall likability) , I used to make up for it with bitchiness and lock my feelings away into a place that access was limited. Then I made a conscious decision to be a better, nicer person and it seems that have lost some of my self confidence along the way. I guess life is all about the road to self improvement. It has always been a struggle for me to do some things that are second nature to others, and I also get nervous and seem to loose my words under pressure. I can't seem to express myself the way I used to, then it was so effortless and now, not so much. I am always so worried about the opinions of others. I just have to find the energy and patience to keep plugging away. Also here is a photo of a pensive fox. Goodnight.
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Confidence, Sometimes I don't haz it.
Yeah, as much as I would like to think that I have grown up, gained knowledge, become better, smarter, the similarities to the past are still stark. I have never been the most confident person. I have always been uncomfortable with parts of my life, (weight, general looks, overall likability) , I used to make up for it with bitchiness and lock my feelings away into a place that access was limited. Then I made a conscious decision to be a better, nicer person and it seems that have lost some of my self confidence along the way. I guess life is all about the road to self improvement. It has always been a struggle for me to do some things that are second nature to others, and I also get nervous and seem to loose my words under pressure. I can't seem to express myself the way I used to, then it was so effortless and now, not so much. I am always so worried about the opinions of others. I just have to find the energy and patience to keep plugging away. Also here is a photo of a pensive fox. Goodnight.
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confidence and kindness are learned skills that feel quite unnatural, insincere, and dehumanizing at times, but are things that require a transformation of your psyche/perceptions in order to feel normal. i know what you are going through and believe me it is not easy and the practice indeed robs you of self confidence at first, but continue to set your intention and everything will fall into place. believe in yourself and it will continue to get easier. just remember that your thoughts are constantly co-creating your reality and the more humor and optimism you bring into your situation will make it that much better. i'm so happy for you, keep it up, i know you can do it!
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